This week has been an amazing week! As the 1 year anniversary of my husband's entrance into his eternal home has approached, I knew I only wanted to celebrate! Not just to celebrate what God has done for me, which is unimaginable and, completely, unexplainable, but to celebrate Jim being home, knowing, now, by sight, what he only believed by faith to be true and real! To celebrate by my faith, what I only know in part, what Jim now knows fully! Jim now sees his Savior face to face, he knows now, by experience, His complete and unconditional love; he knows complete peace! Oh, how I too, long to be home!
Though, without doubt, this has been the hardest year of my entire life, I can also say that I have never been so blessed! Jim was here one minute and was not the next, the void was massive, the loss was beyond anything I'd ever known and I couldn't stand, so God, in His great mercy, has carried me and taken care of me in ways I could have never imagined! He has been ever present!
This year my thoughts have be filled with heaven and a 1000 questions! How I've longed to see what Jim sees and to know what he now knows! I've been so blessed through his going home, in that it's caused me to be far more heavenly minded; it's caused me to realize that this life is but a vapor, we are here today and gone tomorrow. It's made me more conscious of not taking anything for granted, especially others and to be mindful of making every minute count ~ to be more mindful of purposing how I live each day. It's taken the fear of death away and made me long more to be home myself, to see my Savior face to face!
This year has brought to the forefront the height of my weakness, while, at the same time, bringing the depth of God's amazing love and presence front and center! God in His mercy took the tragic that grieved my heart til it felt like it was broken and then showed me Himself with such loving intimacy that my grief has been turned to complete joy and awe!
A year later, though it still hurts, I can still say, "My God is still enough ~ He is my ALL in ALL!" I couldn't have gotten through this without Him! He has sustained me, been my Comfort and given me the will to go on! He is my Hope and my Joy! Though, I can say, "Lord, I don't know how to move on from here ~ I don't want to be a victim, but a victor." I can also say with all confidence, that God's got me, completely ~ I am completely secure in Him and He will see me through one day at a time and one moment at a time! I look to Him, now, for everything!
God has brought many other widows into my path this year and they have been a great comfort to me ~ I have hung on their every word. Their compassion and willingness to take a moment to comfort has blessed me beyond words! Now, God's bringing me full circle and giving me opportunities to bless others too, to minister to those who have found their grief too hard to bear ~ to do the unimaginable, to be His hand, His feet, to minister as I've been ministered to ~ to be a blessing to another and that brings shear joy!
I'd love to be able to sit awhile with Jim right now and be able to share the excitement of the amazing things God has done this past year; but even more to hear the unspeakable awe of the things Jim has seen, to hear about his year in heaven and of our Living Lord that he now knows fully! How I long to be HOME, to see my Savior face to face, to hug Jim's face, but until then I will count the days and hours and I will seek with all my heart to be God's blessing to others!
God's grace has been His greatest gift ~ Jesus paid the price with His blood, He died in my place ~ He is my scape goat, He bore my sin and by accepting Christ as my Sacrificial Lamb, I have been claimed righteous, though I am a sinner, I have been saved by grace through my choice of faith, to believe what God says in His Word is true! There's nothing I can do or am asked to do for that wonderful gift of love, but simply believe by faith that His blood shed for me was enough to cover my sin!
The gift of Christmas has always been that Jesus came to save a lost world ~ but not all will believe, not many will accept His gift! I have opened that gift, but the blessing goes beyond that, the greatest gift is God in us, the hope of glory! When we choose faith, to believe and come to God on His terms, He deposits His Spirit within us, He abides in us! He will walk with us and then take us into glory! A little of heaven on earth!
Heaven has come to earth, but do you have eyes to see? Do you know our Living Lord? Do you know His voice? Do you know what it's like to walk with Him in the cool of the day? To know His peace? To know Him intimately? Do you know the depth of His love or the height of His amazing grace?
His Christmas message has always been: "Come all ye who are weary and heavy laden and I will give you rest!"
The real Christmas gift lies in the verse below. Have you opened it?
Revelation 3:20 says,
"Here I am! I stand at the door and knock. If anyone hears my voice and opens the door, I will come in and eat with him, and he with me."
There's much to celebrate for those that have eyes to see!
"I am the Way, the Truth and the Life, no one comes to the Father, except by Me."
He invites you to come! If you're reading this I am praying for you! Want you come?
P.S. Yes, for those of you who have followed me through my grief ~ God is still doing the unimaginable! The unexplainable! I am in awe of Him!
